jetpackexhaust:

Father of two walks on the moon
FATHER OF TWO DEFEATS FATHER OF ONE
Father of two kills Kennedy
Father of three writes Hamlet
Some guy who doesn’t even have any kids crucified or something.
Telegraph, the only time a headline should start with “Mother of three” is if those three are flying on their gigantic wings to melt The Wall and destroy Westeros.

jetpackexhaust:

  • Father of two walks on the moon
  • FATHER OF TWO DEFEATS FATHER OF ONE
  • Father of two kills Kennedy
  • Father of three writes Hamlet
  • Some guy who doesn’t even have any kids crucified or something.

Telegraph, the only time a headline should start with “Mother of three” is if those three are flying on their gigantic wings to melt The Wall and destroy Westeros.

544 notes

yougreaserfuck:

there is now a tinder knock off that instead of matching you with sleazy weird dudes it matches you with dogs looking for a new home
www.barkbuddy.com

go nuts tumblr

38,978 notes

Today’s Proverb: Most people think Pit Bulls are dangerous dogs. But biologically speaking, most Pit Bulls are just three Shih Tzus wearing a trench coat.
Welcome To Night Vale (via deniblogginstuff)

60 notes

tandemfatum:

I said I was going to work on my essay today but I couldn’t focus because I needed to get Steve Carlsberg feels out of my system
Now it’s 9 o’clock and I don’t have an essay so I’m going to go walk to Burger King write that essay

tandemfatum:

I said I was going to work on my essay today but I couldn’t focus because I needed to get Steve Carlsberg feels out of my system

Now it’s 9 o’clock and I don’t have an essay so I’m going to go walk to Burger King write that essay

1,129 notes

Loki Week: Villanous moments & Deaths - Agent of Asgard.
"I shot a fish with a bazooka.” xx

1,138 notes

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

gallifrey-feels:

More fun facts about ancient Celtic marriage laws: There were no laws against interclass or interracial marriage, no laws against open homosexual relationships (although they weren’t considered ‘marriages’ since the definition of a marriage was ‘couple with child’), no requirement for women to take their husband’s names or give up their property, but comedians couldn’t get married

It’s Adam and Eve not Adam Sandler and Eve

(Source: saltwaterandink)

101,779 notes

aurorablossomchxl:

capo-verde:

envycamacho:

kim-jong-healthy:

humpback whales in their natural habitat before deforestation forced them into the sea

this is actually so cool

Fuck

kinda scary

325,086 notes

daddyhole:

i hate people who take posts like “black ladies are beautiful” and say “YOU MEAN EVERYONE IS BEAUTIFUL”

its like showing up to a little celebratory function for an unappreciated tech crew of a movie and going “DONT U THINK THE ACTORS ARE IMPORTANT TOO???”

son the actors already have the red carpet and four billion dollars sit down

(Source: slimydad)

65,935 notes

tentakrule:

bloodredflamia:

tentakrule:

notablyindigo:

il-tenore-regina:

gryffin-dyke:

heytheretylerr:

WHAT KIND OF WIZARD FISH IS THIS

*puts up bat signal for science side of tumblr*

I read that this is bioluminescent plankton. 

nah man that’s a tiny kaiju

This is actually the bioluminescence from an ostracod, which is a kind of plankton. The fish in the gif is trying to eat it, but the ostracod bursts out this light to scare its predator and cause it to spit the plankton out. You can watch the video that this is from over here.

Thank you science side of tumblr!

tentakrule:

bloodredflamia:

tentakrule:

notablyindigo:

il-tenore-regina:

gryffin-dyke:

heytheretylerr:

WHAT KIND OF WIZARD FISH IS THIS

*puts up bat signal for science side of tumblr*

I read that this is bioluminescent plankton. 

nah man that’s a tiny kaiju

This is actually the bioluminescence from an ostracod, which is a kind of plankton. The fish in the gif is trying to eat it, but the ostracod bursts out this light to scare its predator and cause it to spit the plankton out. You can watch the video that this is from over here.

Thank you science side of tumblr!

image

90,155 notes